From the monthly archives:
April 2008
I was re-packing my comp trolley this evening when I decided I would photograph it’s contents and explain what it is I have and why. Now considering I have a lot of gear (all necessary of course) I’m going to break it down into parts. So here we go.
Now first things first. At Spotlight I bought cheap black bed linen/domestic linen to use in the house during competition season so that when the dream tan rubs off not only can you not see it on the linen but it also won’t ruin my good linen. A small investment for a long term gain, that’s smart thinking on my behalf I say. 
)
Drop Sheet
I picked this up from a $2 Shop. It’s to place on the ground under all my gear so I don’t get dream tan all over the place. Bodybuilding federations are getting very particular about this due to cleaning costs at venues, I’m only to happy to do my bit.
Large Towel
This is for the end of the night when I take off all my dream tan with a bottle of baby oil. I simply pour the baby oil over my body part and wipe of with the towel. It is that simple.
Bath Matt
This gets placed down on the drop sheet to keep my feet warm when I’m applying dream tan. I don’t want to get sick!
Hand Towel
I like clean hands so I use this throughout the day when they constantly get sticky from eating honey on rice cakes. LOL!! I don’t even apply dream tan on them until the last application as I’m constantly eating and going to the toilet, there’s no point applying it before hand if it’s only going to get washed off and smudged off I say.
Stay tuned for my Comp Trolley Part II. )
so I made the decision yesterday morning to not compete at the 2008 All Female Classic. There were obviously a lot of contributing factors so I sat down with my husband and we wrote up a pro’s and con’s list to ensure we were making the right decision. Unfortunately it was unanimous, to compete at this particular competition wasn’t the right thing to do for me at this point in time so I’m bowing out gracefully.
As you all know, I was already behind in my comp prep and I accepted full responsibility for that because I had no-one to blame but myself for my self-sabotage. (Now ladies, before you start commenting that I’m being to hard on myself I’M NOT! This is my blog and I’m going to have my say, SO PLEASE let me say it without judgement and if you could simply accept and support me through this time irrespective of what you think and feel I would appreciate it, thank you.) Because of this fact I felt I was constantly under the pump with my training and dieting, I felt it’s presence every second of every day all self-imposed of course. I gave it my best shot, but it wasn’t going to be enough to get me in my best possible condition to be competitive. The main reason it boiled down to was my not wanting to go backwards and end up at the very beginning all over again. I’ve spent a year already working with my sports psychologist on creating and living a much healthier lifestyle and I’m not quite equipped enough to get through these toughest of times yet without paying a price and a hefty one at that. I also refuse to step on stage in anything less then my best possible condition and near enough isn’t good enough in my world.
With Mum now living with us and requiring our care it kind of changed everything and it’s a lot harder than I originally though, both physically and psychologically. Also what you didn’t realise was that the week before the competition we would’ve been back in Melbourne for Chemotherapy. This wouldn’t have been an ideal situation when I’m supposed to be focusing on getting myself ready and at that stage of the game I couldn’t afford mistakes. Mum’s health and well being is so much more important than that and now that I’m her full time carer I have to ensure she gets the best possible care from me, not a half hearted effort because I’m to busy training and/or dieting.
So many other things have also been pushed into the back seat which really are equally as important to me. Things like my studies, I haven’t touched them for so long yet I’m so close to finishing. I haven’t been writing my articles or spending anywhere near enough time online in the forum as I would liked. Again there hasn’t been any pressure but they’re things I want to do and I just haven’t been doing them due to my bad time management.
My training, dieting, health and sleep have all been impacted and not in a good way. Like the title says, something had to give. To compete at the all female was the last thing I decided to do so it made sense that it was the first thing to go. I don’t feel great about making this decision, in actual fact I’m wracked with guilt but I know it’s the right thing to do for now.
So I’m bowing out gracefully ladies. I’ll be reverting back to what I’ve done in the past of competing in the ADF Titles on the 22nd September as my first comp for the competition season. This now gives me 21 Weeks to prepare. This time I’m going to get it right!
This week I have a lot of sorting out to do, both in my mind and in my life. I have to sit down and prioritise all my commitments then work out and practice better time management. I’ll keep you up to date with what’s going on but until then thank you once again for listening. )
UPDATE: As my husband so kindly put it: “you may have lost the battle, but you haven’t lost the war”. If taking a step backwards is going to help me move forwards long term then so be it. I want this to be a healthy lifestyle and unfortunately I’m not quite there yet with emotional eating. It’s a short term sacrafice for a long term game, that’s what’s important here.
UPDATE # 2: Skin Folds & Symmetry Photos are up over at LindyOlsen’s Forum for what it’s worth.
